


Nose Ring

by SquishyCool



Category: iCarly
Genre: Humor, Poetry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2009-02-15
Updated: 2009-05-04
Packaged: 2013-08-02 19:30:46
Rating: T
Chapters: 12
Words: 4,727
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4864860/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1394403/SquishyCool
Summary: After school one day, you stumble across a notebook, which happens to be filled with 7-lined notecards, all written by Sam Puckett about her life and observations. Turns out: this notebook is more than you thought. Cam/Spam/Seddie & more.





	1. Ridgeway High Hallways

**Nose Ring  
An Introduction**

You're walking the halls of Ridgeway High, heading to your locker. The bell rang long ago, but you were stuck in Mr. Howard's class, cleaning all the desks because he caught you sleeping during one of his "enriched" lectures. There's no one around, save for janitors and a few chatty teachers, and stray papers lay strewn across the floor or sticking out of lockers. Most are blank pieces of notebook paper, or old worksheets, or ripped-up notes between friends. You're used to this familiar image by now – Mr. Howard definitely does not favor you, so it's not often you get out of school on time when you have his class at the end of the day.

Suddenly, you turn the corner to find a lone, worn, red-and-yellow notebook lying on the tiled floor, a few papers sticking out and a footprint or two on it. You've never found a whole notebook on the ground before, and your curiosity gets the best of you. You pick up the notebook and continue on your way to your locker, dusting it off. You stuff the stray papers back inside of it safely and examine the front: there are Cuttlefish and Drake Bell stickers, and a few doodles of the initials _SP_, as well as _Sam_ written several different times in several different writing styles. There are also several logos for iCarly dot com all over the notebook, front and back, including a few pictures of who you know to be Carly Shay and Sam Puckett doing their webshow together.

Now you're really excited as you realize just whose notebook this is… Sam Puckett from iCarly! She's not exactly "popular", but she's definitely a legend. She and Carly are slight celebrities around the school, and they're known for being just about the funniest couple of girls in Seattle. You watch their webshow every week, and you've watched every extra segment on their site about a hundred times over – they're just hilarious and irresistible!

You've hurried to your locker to stuff your books inside, and now you're leaving school, on your way home. Your heart is beating faster inside your chest at the mere _thought_ of what you'll do with this notebook when you get home.

When you finally do get home, you rush to your room and throw your things to the side, plopping down on your bed and placing the notebook in front of you. The stickers and doodles attract your eyes, but you decide to muster up the courage and finally open it, your eyes searching the pages. You flip through them hurriedly, skimming each page with your eyes to see just what you were getting into. You find that all but maybe 10 or 20 of the pages are full. Each page has 2 notecards taped to it (using both sides of the lined paper for a total of 4 cards per 2-sided page), and each notecard has a date on the top - it ranges anywhere from 2 or 3 notecards having the same date to about 5 or 6 notecards having the same date, meaning she used a different amount of cards each day, depending on how much she felt like observing and how much was worth writing about. They are all written with similar writing from the cover of the notebook, some of them more obviously jotted down than others. Each notecard has a 7-line observation, making them all somewhat poetic… like a new age haiku or something. The dates of the notecards start in October of 2010, which was just about a month-and-a-half after the school year started. The last postcard is dated from today.

You find this somewhat odd, but even more compelling and intriguing.

You look to see that the inside of the cover of the battered notebook has a name, phone number, school name, and city in the top left corner. It reads:

_**Sam Puckett  
****206-988-4239****  
Ridgeway High School  
Class of 2012  
Seattle, WA  
iCarly(dot com)**_

Your eyes widen a little at seeing this, but you try to ignore it; you're way too curious not to look through this thing now.

With eager hands and excited eyes, you begin to read the notecards, Sam's well-known voice and tone filling your head as each word darts past your eyes. The first written date has 3 notecards to it.

However, for the next few hours, you find that you're in for a bit more than you bargained for…

**to be continued…**

**

* * *

A/N: **It's a proven fact that Sam had to repeat the 3rd grade, so she's technically a year older than Carly and Freddie, which makes her 17 in her junior year, about to turn 18 in April. They're all set to be juniors in this, and it's set to start in 2010, and end sometime in the beginning of 2011, near the end of the school year. That makes Carly and Freddie 16, and Spencer 28. Carly will turn 17 in January, Freddie will turn 17 in February, and Spencer will turn 28 in November of 2010 and then 29 in November of 2011.  
This entire story was inspired by a notecard at FOUNDMAGAZINE dot com. The link to the exact notecard can be found in my bio, beside the summary of this story down at the bottom of my profile, where I put all the upcoming stories I'm typing.  
I still haven't decided what the pairings are going to be for this, I just know it's going to be Sam-centric (obviously), though I've got some pretty interesting ideas so far. If you read this and the first chapter, please let me know what you think.


	2. October 5, 2010

_**10/5/2010  
**_

My nose ring is infected  
yet again  
it's really pissing me off  
but the coolness-factor is  
rising up at least 4 notches  
with this infected ring  
shoved right through my nostril

Mom is not so observant  
except when she's awake  
weird, though:  
she didn't care much  
about the piercing  
so much as she cared  
where all the mayonnaise had gone

Carly always winces  
when she glances at my nose  
I don't care, though  
I already told her  
it's junior year  
and I'm Sam Puckett  
a nose ring is destiny


	3. October 6, 2010

_**10/6/2010**_

Some people "can't believe  
I actually know how to read"  
and some people, like Rona,  
get punched for being so stupid  
which is why I'm now stuck in detention  
writing these lines  
over and over and over and over

I will not punch other kids.  
I will not punch other kids.  
I will not punch other kids.  
I will not punch other kids.  
I will not punch other kids.  
I will punch Rona Burger  
when she clearly has it coming

Sometimes when I walk home  
after a long day's detention  
I wonder if my mom ever notices  
that I hardly ever sleep at home  
or even show up after school  
but then I find a sandwich on the ground  
and continue on my way to Carly's

Carly and Freddie aren't home  
Spencer is working on something weird  
so I sit on the couch  
and watch _Girly Cow_  
waiting and waiting and waiting  
and eating and eating and eating  
Spencer makes me laugh really hard sometimes

I sometimes wonder if there's something up  
that I haven't been told about  
when it comes to Carls and Freddork  
but then I realize that's ridiculous  
and Freddie's a loser  
and Carly's almost too pretty  
to even hang out with me

Freddie made a comment  
about my nose ring  
so I stuffed popcorn up his nose  
and macaroni and cheese into his ears  
and slapped him  
I don't think  
he'll be back over tonight

* * *

**A/N: **I've finally decided what the pairing(s) will be for this story, so NO MORE SUGGESTIONS! =] Basically, I'll tell you this... Sam's gon' have some swaggaaa in this story. Haha  
Hope you're enjoying it so far, and I hope you'll continue reading! I'm probably going to be updating everyday, or at least trying to. Please subscribe and favorite if you like the story, and be sure to review with any thoughts you might have! I reply to most reviews!


	4. October 7, 2010

_**10/7/2010**_

I was broke at lunch  
yet again  
so I took Gibby's lunch money  
and shoved him  
right into a trashcan  
(not down the stairs)  
and Carly says I can't be sensitive

Carly and Freddie  
are sitting together  
and kinda whispering  
and what the hell?  
she always saves her pudding  
for me  
that nerd is gonna get it

Miss Briggs yelled at me  
so I threw a stapler  
at her ass  
it hit square on  
I got another week  
of detention with Howard  
but it was so worth it

Spencer isn't home tonight  
because he's on a date  
so I invite a couple senior boys  
over for pie  
Carly doesn't like that  
until she sees the blond one  
and how white his teeth are

The senior boys are cool  
times 10  
they even invited us  
to a party  
Saturday night  
I think we get cooler and cooler  
every year

When I get home  
there's mail for me  
on the table  
but it's just  
a clump of cat hair  
taped to paper  
from J'Mam-maw

I woke up  
at 3 am  
after this really weird dream  
me and Carly were alone  
and she was smiling  
and I was really happy  
and I'm going back to sleep now


	5. October 8, 2010

_**10/8/2010**_

Hot water was shut off  
yet again  
so I have to shower at Carly's  
I pick the lock  
and Carly is still sleeping  
and her shower  
is so clean

Good thing I got up  
so early today  
even Carly is still asleep  
and it's kinda weird  
how beautiful she looks  
from this angle  
and how I always notice

For some reason  
Carly is still surprised  
every time that I'm there  
when she wakes up  
and that my mom  
doesn't always remember  
to pay bills

Carly is talking  
the whole way  
to school  
but I'm not really listening  
I'm too busy thinking  
about what we're gonna do  
at that senior's party

Tomorrow night seems  
so far away  
I give Freddie a wedgie  
and I stuff pudding  
down Gibby's pants  
but the time still  
drags on so slowly

A kid said I looked  
like a clown  
with my infected ring  
so I stomped on his feet  
and slammed his head  
into a locker  
and he said "a really HOT clown"

It started raining  
while me and Carly  
were driving home  
Fredward's mommy called  
28 times  
and every time  
I told her we were dead

If Mrs. Benson could ground me  
I'd never leave the house  
but she can't  
so Freddie got yelled at  
somehow, though, he's still  
going to the party  
tomorrow night

Spencer made me a sculpture  
of a giant nose  
with a ring through its nostril  
entitled, "Sniffected"  
people need to cut it out  
with the infection jokes  
already

I hugged Spencer  
for the sculpture  
and the weirdest thing happened  
my face turned pink  
and my mouth  
got all dry  
I must be dehydrated

I always remember  
Carly smelling good  
just like the pajamas  
I'm always borrowing  
and I've always wondered  
what perfume she must  
be wearing 24/7


	6. October 9, 2010

_**10/9/2010**_

I wake up  
around noon  
and it's way too early  
but Carly is shaking me  
and there's bacon  
downstairs  
and everyone else is up

When I got downstairs  
I realized  
I forgot to put pants on  
but I was already downstairs  
so I just pulled my shirt down  
took a seat  
and devoured the bacon

Spencer keeps looking at me  
all weird  
and then looking away  
whenever our eyes meet  
and I can't help but wonder  
does my nose ring  
really look THAT bad??

Watching Carly get dressed  
can be fun  
she can't decide on a top  
and can't find matching pants/skirt  
and then she's standing there  
in her bra  
trying to decide

Carly and Spencer  
go to the store  
and leave me and Fredweird  
on the couch  
watching _Extreme Housewives_  
and I ALMOST reach over  
just to ruffle his hair

We finally leave  
in Spencer's car  
and I'm sitting in the back  
next to Freddork  
and everyone's laughing  
and it all makes me  
so happy

The senior's party  
was nothing  
like I expected  
but it was so fun  
just to see Carly  
dancing around like that  
and laughing

I've never been much  
of a bad kid  
except for tonight  
I couldn't resist  
when they held that joint  
right in front of me  
and said, "just once"

My mom  
would probably actually  
start being worried  
if she knew I was doing  
what she used to do  
but it's so much fun  
and the room is so spinny

We didn't get home  
until much after  
2 in the morning  
Freddie got in trouble  
and Spencer was asleep  
and I raided the fridge  
until there was nothing left but tea

I lay next to Carly  
and I listen to her breathe  
and I try to steady  
my eyesight  
but I can't seem to  
because she's  
all I can see

I barfed  
yet again  
but it wasn't so bad  
vodka is vodka  
and bodies are bodies  
and what am I  
saying again?

I am drifting off  
but I feel  
like something's missing  
I can't quite place it  
but I'm not too worried  
I'll worry  
when I'm conscious again

I wake up  
yet again  
around 5 am  
and I hear trains  
and Carly's light snoring  
and that's all it takes  
to put me back to sleep


	7. October 10, 2010

_**10/10/2010**_

I woke up  
with Carly's arms  
around me  
and her nose  
against my neck  
and a smile  
on my face

MY NOSE RING  
IS GONE  
NO LONGER PRESENT  
AND NOT IN MY NOSTRIL  
I AM  
FREAKING OUT  
RIGHT NOW

I searched  
Carly's room  
about 20 times over  
but all I found  
was an old sandwich  
I lost a month ago  
and no nose ring

I just realized  
today's date  
is 10/10/10  
which is kinda  
cool, but…  
WAIT –  
FOCUS, SAM!

Carly is helping  
me look  
but I can tell  
she's secretly hoping  
the nose ring  
is gone  
forever

I knew  
I should've  
bought an extra ring  
even though  
I probably would've  
lost that one  
by now, too

I'm not going  
home tonight  
because my mom  
will notice  
the missing ring  
and most likely  
make fun of me

The only probable  
explanation  
is that I lost the ring  
at the party  
when I passed out  
or when I got in that  
wrestling match

You know, you  
really shouldn't  
wrestle with seniors  
because they're large  
and heavy  
and they tend  
to rip out body jewelry

I was tired  
from all the searching  
so I laid down  
and took a nap  
and when I woke up  
Carly was gone  
and so was Spencer

They came back  
after I ate all the chili  
in the fridge  
and it turns out  
they went to the store  
and got me  
a new nose ring

The alcohol  
in my piercing  
burns  
but Spencer says  
it's better  
than looking like a clown  
and risking my nose

Spencer's hands  
right on my face  
and our noses  
almost touching  
I feel shaky  
and weak  
or is that the infection?

Carly closed her eyes  
when I put  
the new ring  
through my nose  
but when she saw it  
she smiled  
and that made me happy

Carly and Freddork  
say it looks better  
now that it's not  
all red  
and irritated  
so I gave Freddie  
a wedgie

"Why did you  
give me a wedgie?!"  
"because I wanted  
to show you  
what red and irritated  
really meant,  
fudgeface"

Spence and Carls  
do way too much  
for me  
sometimes  
but they kinda  
have to  
or I wouldn't survive


	8. October 11, 2010

_**10/11/2010**_

Sunday morning  
I wake up  
and it's raining  
Spencer is cooking  
pancakes downstairs  
but I lay in bed  
and watch Carly sleep

The sun leaks through  
the pale pink curtains  
making her hair  
shine just right  
and her eyes open  
and I smile  
just at seeing her

We don't get out  
of bed  
until Spencer calls  
and hearing his cheerful voice  
makes me smile  
like seeing Carly's  
sleepy eyes does

Freddie comes over  
and eats pancakes  
with us  
and we're all really quiet  
and I'm not sure why  
but I like  
being with all of them

I don't remember when  
I started feeling  
this way about Carly  
all I know  
is that it's always there  
and it won't go away  
for a long time (if ever)

Spencer and Carly leave  
for Sunday grocery shopping  
but I stay here  
and eat Fat Cakes  
and watch _Girly Cow_  
and wonder when  
all these feelings started

I fall asleep  
and wake up  
and Freddie is there  
eating a Fat Cake  
and watching _Girly Cow_  
so I just watch him  
and smile

I realize the Fat Cake  
is MY LAST Fat Cake  
and I get pissed  
and take it from him  
and eat it  
then slap him  
for being so careless

What is he thinking  
being here  
alone with me?  
I COULD punch him  
or drown him  
or even _kiss_ him  
with no one knowing

I go to the kitchen  
and stuff my face  
with chili  
because I'm acting crazy  
and chili always  
brings me back  
to sanity

I don't want to  
go home  
but tomorrow's Monday  
and Mom's bitching  
about feeding the cat  
so I have dinner  
and leave the Shays'

I don't do homework  
I just lay in bed  
after my shower  
and read  
and when I try to sleep  
all I can think about  
is Carly… Spencer… Freddie

* * *

**A/N: **I keep getting this same question: _Who is reading the journal?_ Well... seeing as I did not name any characters except the teachers, Sam, Freddie, Carly, and Spencer... and seeing as I put the intro in second-person and IN that second-person was "...you realize this is the girl from iCarly." Who do you _think_ is reading the journal? YOU. JUST YOU. It's not anyone special; it's just setting it as if YOU are the one walking the halls and YOU are the one reading the notebook. That's it! I promise! The only reason I put in that intro/summary is because I wanted to make it a little more realistic and believable and put it so you could put yourself in the position and have a setting for the reading of this notebook.  
So please stop asking that question. Thank you. Otherwise, all reviews are appreciated, and I'll try to answer any other questions you may have as best I can.


	9. October 13, 2010

_**10/13/2010**_

Being 17 is not  
that awesome  
except when I'm  
beating up freshmen  
and remembering  
how much cooler I was  
when I was 15

There's a new kid  
in Miss Briggs' class  
and he's cute  
but I don't know  
if he's a nub  
or if he actually might  
be someone of interest

It's this kid's  
first day  
and he's shooting  
spitwads  
at Miss Briggs' ass  
and they're all hitting  
right on target

I can't help  
but laugh  
because Miss Briggs is so  
completely oblivious  
and this kid is so  
completely evil  
I want to know him

Carly isn't impressed  
until she sees  
the new kid in person  
and now it's like  
Jake Crandell all over again  
minus the doucheyness  
plus some awesomeness

We walk home  
giggling  
and we both want  
that kid's number  
but it's not a competition  
because that was hard enough  
the first time around

* * *

**A/N: **Sorry for the delay on an update. I got busy over the weekend. And then the site was being gay and not letting anyone log in. But anyhow, I'll try to continue updating daily, but no guarantees. I hope you like the OC I introduced in this chapter. Let me know what you think!


	10. October 14, 2010

_**10/14/2010**_

I find Carly in the hallway  
this morning  
chatting up that new kid  
and I stand back  
and watch  
and get jealous  
but who am I jealous over?

This class lasts too long  
and she talks too much  
and all I can  
think about  
is that smile on Carly's face  
and the gleam  
in that kid's eye

Carly texted me  
and told me  
she got his number  
and his name  
is Atticus -  
as in  
To Kill A Mockingbird

I got the kid's number  
at lunch  
and he seemed interested  
we both love ham  
and hate Miss Briggs  
and wow, his blond hair  
is so perfect


	11. October 15, 2010

_**10/15/2010**_

I finally get the courage  
and text Atticus  
to find out he's from  
Los Angeles  
where dreams are made  
and dreams are broken  
and beauty is defined

This kid is texting  
me and Carly  
at the same time  
and I can feel myself  
getting jealous –  
but not even  
over him

I take the chance  
and I tell the kid  
that Carly is my best friend  
and he'd better back off  
and he says "lol"  
like I'm joking  
but I don't joke about Carly

Atticus pisses me off  
and Freddie is nearby  
so I slap him to take my anger out  
he asks why  
and I tell him  
because his shirt is geeky  
…but that's not true at all

I've called Spencer "handsome"  
plenty of times before  
but I don't know if  
it's ever meant so much  
even though he doesn't think  
it does  
he can't know

How wrong do you think  
it is  
to have a crush  
on your best friend's big brother  
…AND your best friend  
…AND your best frenemy  
…AND some LA fag?

* * *

**A/N: **I apologize for the delay in updates - on ALL of my fics. But you just have to understand I've had more important things to worry about. I've got grades and the risk of failing junior year altogether, and I've got work, and I'm also in an RP, which has distracted me... But anyway, I'll try to bring you more updates, but I've had some writer's block, too. I've got part of the next chapter of this written already, though. I do get all of your reviews telling me to update, and telling me how much you love this and all that, and I appreciate them, so keep them coming! Telling me what you like gives me more encouragement and motivation to write :)  
Also, for fans of my Cam fic, _Congratulations_: I've decided on the sequel to it and I'll get to working on it eventually. Not sure when, though, especially since I've already got 2 other songfics partially written that I need to finish. But it'll exist, that's the point.


	12. October 16, 2010

_**10/16/2010**_

I don't find out  
Carly's going out tonight  
until she's getting ready  
and by then it's too late  
to protest and try  
to convince her not to go  
but I try anyway

Carly's going out tonight  
with Atticus  
and that pisses me off  
for a few reasons:  
1) she didn't tell me till now  
2) he didn't tell me either  
and 3) I have nothing to do now

Carly leaves in her helping bra  
(yeah, she gets a new one  
every frickin' year)  
and now I'm stuck here  
with Freddork  
and Spencer  
and all my hormones

So I don't go home  
even though Carly doesn't come back  
until after I fall asleep  
but what can I say –  
Spencer's spaghetti tacos  
are so worth skipping  
another crappy sandwich at home

Fredwina has to eat with us  
and ruin the moment  
I thought me and Spencer  
were having  
which is explanation  
for the noogie I gave the dork  
while Spencer's in the bathroom

It seems to be  
a perfectly normal dinner  
until the geek says something  
and I throw noodles at his face  
and suddenly  
pasta and shells are flying everywhere…  
FOOD FIGHT!

We all collapsed  
on the kitchen floor  
laughing uncontrollably  
and rubbing spaghetti sauce  
in each other's hair  
and it was the happiest I've been  
in forever

I bet Carly's kissing  
that Atticus kid  
right now  
but what she doesn't know  
is that I'm watching her brother  
and her neighbor  
wipe sauce off their arms and legs

Is it weird  
that I kinda wanna  
get these boys  
tied down  
and LICK the red sauce  
off their bodies…?  
nahh, totally normal

Crap...  
it probably can't be good  
to get spaghetti sauce  
in and around  
your still-healing nose ring  
but this will make  
for another interesting sculpture

Now we have to shower  
one-by-one  
and Freddie can't go home  
'cause he's tired of tick baths  
and Mrs. Benson is convinced  
pasta and ticks have some sort  
of correlation

While the tech nerd  
is in the shower  
Spencer acts kinda weird  
and then asks me  
WHY I always bully the waste of air  
and that he's noticed  
how I've been looking at Freddie lately

Deny, deny, deny  
what else can I do  
when your best friend's  
awesome/super hot/hilarious big brother  
is accusing you  
of having a crush  
on the biggest dork to walk the earth?

It's weird  
but Spencer and I…  
we have a moment  
where he wipes some stray sauce  
from my cheek  
and then stares at me like…  
then Freddifer walks out

I think Fredward is  
trying something  
like what me and Spencer had  
while Spencer's in the shower  
but I stop that pretty quick  
with a good ol' Texas wedgie  
right when Spencer comes out to pull me off

While I'm in the shower  
all I can think about  
are the 2 boys  
waiting in the living room  
and how much  
I wish  
I could just have both

Note to self:  
never shower in Spencer's  
shower ever again  
because it possesses me  
with (really) weird thoughts  
about best friends' older brothers  
and hopeless dorks

So after our showers  
we all have a threesome…  
just kidding  
but I do fall asleep  
watching _Girly Cow_  
with my head in Spencer's lap  
and my legs over Freddie's

It's kinda funny  
how I thought the night  
was going to be totally jank  
but it wasn't at all  
not even when Carly comes home  
and doesn't wake me up  
before lying down next to me

* * *

**A/N: **Sorry for the lack of updates, but I'm busy and have a lot of other things to do, including saving up for a plane ticket for a trip to LA in June, which includes working a LOT more hours, and then a bunch of homework so I don't fail junior year. Things should get better this summer, but no promises. Don't worry, though; updates may be few and far between, but at least they're existent.  
I dunno if any of you have noticed, but there have been TWO stories inspired by this story so far. _Longing_ by **Dragonfly8716**, and _Insert Pretentious Title Here_ by **plug in baby57**. I highly recommend them both because they were both actually quite entertaining! Keep the ideas flowing, guys! I love seeing stuff like that =D  
I also love reviews and hearing about what you like and don't like about the chapters, so don't forget to do so! Thanks.


End file.
